april twenty-two

We can't walk through this world with a kind heart and a blind eye because unfortunately we live in a world that is so easy to betray our kindness. A world that begs us to sleep with one eye open and a world that points out the importance of realism everyday. 

I so badly wish I could open my heart fully to everything I loved. But the fear and reality of an inevitable end always holds me back. Why give all of me to something that will eventually leave it for something more true, more worthwhile?

april eighteen

Hello Goodbye

Yesterday I said goodbye to something that has been an intregal part of me for a very long time- the New Orleans Hornets. I know that I was only saying goodbye to a name but to me it was a lot more.

Last year, my first ever favorite basketball player retired from the game. It was hard to see Peja leave knowing that he was the reason I used to go to basketball games with my dad. To be honest, I didn't go for any other reason than to watch him play. I began to love more than just watching him play but the thing I loved the most was that feeling of watching him shoot a three-pointer and the seconds inbetween the ball leaving his hand and hitting the net. You could feel everyone in the arena take a deep breath and hold it in, their next action uncertain. In seconds everyone would either release with a loud sigh or rise up with cheers.

Those inbetween seconds are the reason I love basketball.

That seed that was planted years and years ago by Peja and that first feeling he gave me was painted teal and purple. I know that I can get that same feeling from any player and I still do, but there is something special about the person that first made you fall in love with something. And just as I hold a special place in my heart for the man who made me love something that is such a large part of who I am, a similar special place lives for the team that buried that seed so deep.

Saying goodbye to the name is not the part that brings me sadness. It is having to say goodbye to all the millions of memories I made in The Hive, in teal and purple, with my family and friends. I am excited and I look forward to making new memories with the Pelicans but I will forever hold in my heart a very special place for the Hornets and all of the ways they taught me to love basketball.

 Hive Memories

High Hats and High Tops Benefit

Acquiring Anthony Davis with the first pick in the 2012 Draft.

Multiple awkward encounters with Marco Belinelli.

Peja Stojakovic

Mom's silly signs

april eighteen

Mouse Fiasco Story

I got to school on Wednesday morning and I was going through my normal morning routine working on the computer and writing on the board. My mentor teacher was in the classroom talking with the speech teacher when all of a sudden I heard her squeal. Apparently a mouse had crawled across the classroom and was hiding under her desk. After calling the janitor and causing all of the students to get hyped up over our new visitor, we settled down and decided to just ignore it. As I was working at the front computer, the student nearest me says. "Ms. Sapera! I just saw the mouse! It is under the computer cart." I half didn't believe him but after him saying over and over again that he wasn't kidding, I slowly retreated from where I was standing. Sure enough, I bent over and looked under the cart and there it was- a little baby field mouse. Right when we went to step toward it, it jetted across toward the door and out into the hall. In an instant, it crawled across the hall, under the door and into the classroom across from us. We didn't have the heart to tell our neighbor teacher that there was now a mouse in her room. Instead we just said we saw it crawl out into the hall and it could be in any room. For the rest of the day we set up a makeshift trap inside of our room so that even if the mouse came in the door, it wouldn't have anywhere to go. The students enjoyed the suspense of whether or not it was going to come back. I enjoyed that it was no longer a possibility of it running across my foot while I was teaching. Later that day, when the janitors were sweeping the trash out of the hallway we found a half eaten, double stack, bacon cheeseburger. I assume this is what it was after.

The mousetrap we created. At least if he came in, he wouldn't have far to go.

Rice Babies

After days and days of asking, my students finally got to take home their rice babies. I wish we could have done more with them (weight and fractions activities) but every since the mouse fiasco in our classroom, we decided it was probably best to get rid of all of the rice.

Most of the students' rice babies turned out absolutely adorably. I couldn't help but take all of their pictures. I hope their parents get a kick out of how precious they are. Watching and listening to them as I made them carry them outside and to the bus, I think they have a new-found appreciation for their mothers carrying them around for 9 months.

Only twelve more days left with these little cuties. I warned them today and it was heartwarming to see that they were just as upset about it as I was.

april seventeen

One Month Mark

The middle of this week marked the one month until graduation date. I think to myself, "one month and it's all over" but, I don't think I genuinely grasp what that means. For me, college has been a long process. It meant changing schools, changing majors, changing who I was and it took six years of my life. To think that it will all finally come to an end in a month is something I am having a very difficult time coming to terms with.

I am sure that the day of graduation will pass without any thoughts or special emotions. But the days that follow, the days when I have nothing to do- those will be the days I think, what now?

And that's every graduates big question. But I like to reassure myself that I have been planning for an answer to this question. I figure it took me six years to actually complete college and I don't particular want to waste any more of my life being unemployed and completely useless. I have set a goal for myself to be employed and moving on with my new adult life by the middle of August.

Hopefully, the next big step in my life will be getting my first real teaching job. I want to move to Texas and I have slightly put all of my eggs in one basket in regards to that. People around me keep telling me that I need to make the decision that will make me the happiest and I know that in a profession like mine, it would be unfair to the students to be anything other than that. So thinking about it more and more, I need to move on from where I am. For more than one reason, I need to leave this town. I need to venture out and build my own life. I need to be that independent version of myself that I want to be. And I need to be surrounded by people and a life that makes me smile each day.

I hope in the future all the things I worked really hard for align themselves perfectly. I like to think that if I live it right, life will give me all the things I cross my fingers for.

april sixteen

Birthdays!

I really love birthdays. I actually really love all holidays (and yes, birthdays are a holiday.) Whenever it is someone else's birthday I feel the need to celebrate for them. I think that probably stems from the fact that I often got jealous of kids in my class who got to celebrate their birthdays during the year and I didn't because mine was in the summer.

This week two of my student teaching colleagues had birthdays. We celebrated one with a cookie cake and fancy balloon (it was from the grocery store around the corner from school). The other we celebrated with homemade cookies and a mini nautical themed goodie bucket.

We seem to be passing around the second grade happy birthday banner a lot lately but I totally don't mind!

april fifteen

The Lorax

This week we are concluding our unit on The Lorax. It was my first time reading this book and I have to say that I absolutely fell in love with it. I was already such a huge admirer of Dr. Seuss' work. I find it fascinating to see how he turn fundamental content into a fun and exciting book for children to read. Starting a unit on recycling and conservation was not as easy as I thought it would be. The concept has large vocabulary for second grade and it was often times difficult for students to understand how they could make a difference.

I say it often (even though I probably shouldn't) but ELA isn't my favorite subject to teach. Often times I find myself bored with the content and having trouble getting the meaning and understanding across to all levels of students. But, for the first time, during the Lorax unit, I felt like all of my students were understanding, engaged and excited about what we were learning.

The most fun for the students was getting to read the book, the play and watch the movie while wearing their mustaches. I loved how much they got into character and applied everything we had previously learned about emotion and characters' feelings.

As we are walking to lunch- "I am really glad you don't bring your lunch in a plastic bag anymore. That was harming the environment." I guess that's what I get for teaching my students to be eco-friendly.

Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better, it's not. - The Lorax

Let it grow, let it grow. You can't reap what you don't sow. - The Lorax (movie)

april nine

As I approach 24 and I see all of the huge decisions I have to make in the coming months, I start to really freak out and ask a lot of questions about where my life is headed and what my life has been. I honestly think I am encountering a quarter life crisis- my big transition into adulthood.

I have a lot of questions on my mind which range from- 'Where do I want to teach?' to 'Have I made enough right decisions up until now, to get what I really want out of life?'

I am such a strong believer in fate and I keep telling myself that I am supposed to be right here, in this situation, at this moment. This is what I was meant to do. But I want to feel strongly about something, about a decision in my life. Because when I look forward and I think, where do you want to teach next year? I really don’t have a solid answer. I have the answer that I have had for years (Dallas), I have the answer my parents gave me (Mandeville) and I have the answer that I consider to be settling (Baton Rouge). But I still couldn’t tell you what the best decision is for me. I couldn’t tell you which one I want more than the others. All I know is that I want to be happy. I want to love my job. I want to have friends. I want a different life than the one I live now. (Not that the one I have now is unsatisfying, it just isn’t exactly what I WANT.)

And I guess my biggest fears are that I will end up alone and unhappy. I will end up in a new city where I have no friends and I will never make friends and I will never meet someone because I am stuck in school every day will females. Or I will end up back in Mandeville with my parents and the same handful of people I went to high school with, none of whom I want to marry. Or I will end up alone in Baton Rouge when all of the people I once called my friends move on to bigger and better things in their lives. And I was too afraid of change so I stayed and settled and once again, I end up alone.

When it comes to making a decision, I fear unhappiness and I fear loneliness. But the sad part is that out of the two, I fear loneliness the most. If I was not alone, at least I would have someone to share in the unhappiness.

So for now I’ve stretched my feelers out in all directions (or that’s the plan). I know that I am leaning more toward one decision over the other two and I think that makes moving forward easier. But even in the moving forward there are always going to be questions in the back of my head. Worries that haunt me and question if I am good enough, smart enough, right enough for all that I want to do. But I know eventually, I will have answers to these questions and I will be able to look back at this time and think, she was so foolish for ever doubting herself and her abilities.

april seven

Stacie's Bridal Shower

My cousin Stacie graciously asked me to be a bridesmaid in her wedding this June and I couldn't have been more honored. This is my first time as a bridesmaid and it has been quite an adventure learning the ropes when it comes to bridesmaid and wedding etiquette.

I have been to plenty other bridal showers but never one when I was actually in charge of running the show. From the other side, you definitely learn how much work, preparation and effort goes into to pulling off this shower successfully- and keeping it a secret from the bride. I was even thankful that I was able to use some of my teacher skills to corral up the chattering ladies to get every one's attention for our games.

The whole thing went off perfectly and Stacie was incredibly thankful and excited- and looked beautiful as ever. But let's be honest, I am looking forward to the bachelorette weekend trip to the beach in two weeks the most!

april four

To get ready for the standardized testing at school, PVP decided to have a pep rally to get the students excited and energized to take their tests. Usually, this pep rally is restricted to 3rd, 4th and 5th grade students. However, this year second grade was invited. To be perfectly honest, this is probably because second grade is the most exciting grade at PVP. We have the best teachers and our excitement was needed for the epic conclusion of the pep rally...

The PVP Harlem Shake

Yes, that is my mentor teacher dressed up in a cardinal costume. Yes, the entire cafeteria was full of hundreds of students. Yes, my kids got freaky in the cafeteria. And of course, I got it all on tape.

When the edited version of this video comes out, I will be sure to update this post so that everyone can see it. The best part of the whole thing was that the kids had no idea. Out of nowhere we took them to the cafeteria, we dressed our teacher in a costume and then for three minutes we let them dance like maniacs. It's moments like these I am really happy to have chosen the career that I did and to be surrounded by such enthusiastic and fun colleagues makes everything worth it.

And if you want to see the best Harlem Shake video I have ever seen.. here it is. 

All you 90's babies, you're welcome.

march thirty

I know that in my life I have not been faced with many of the unfortunate realities of life. Often times this weighs down on me when I look at others close to me who struggle with those realities from time to time. Many times I feel like I don't have much to say or I fear I may say the wrong thing or step into a place I am not welcome. The only thing I know how to do without fear of doing it wrong is to make someone's day a little bit happier.

This time of the year is not the easiest for bez. We will just leave it at that. I don't like to talk to her about things I don't know much about so I decided, as the beginning of my extraordinary year, that I would do my best to turn her week, or at least a day of it, around.

In our friendship we send a lot of mail and we buy each other stupid things. Most of the time this mail is pointless and says stuff like "you're the best" and the things are random things we find at the store that remind each other just how equally matched the two of us are.

After leaving Dallas and realizing her not so easy time was coming up, I decided to send her a package. Will she use all of the things I sent her? Absolutely not. Will she end up throwing some of it away or giving some of it away? I assume so. But that wasn't really the point. The point was that hopefully, in a time when she needs it the most, she will get this in the mail and it will make her smile, if just for a brief moment.

Her box included:

a baseball rubber ducky

a set of baseball playing cards

a baseball notepad

two baseball lunch box bags

a giraffe notebook

a set of giraffe stationary

Batman crayons

Batman pencils

two oversized Batman pens

an Avengers paddleball set

a chevron memopad

an LSU keychain (that I have a matching Ole Miss one)

a deck of "52 reasons I love Kayda" cards

When I set out to make this box for her I thought I would send her one or two things but when I went to the kids section in Michael's I had a severe complex where I got her way more stuff than she probably needed. My favorite thing of all though, I did not buy at the store. My favorite thing in the box is the set of cards with the 52 reasons I love Kayda. 

I am not sure if I explained this or not but "Kayda" is our ship name. If you don't know what a ship is, or if you think it is a boat, go look it up because I'm not getting into that. It will make much more sense once you understand. But back to the cards. I once saw someone make a "52 reasons why I love you" set for their husband. Well, I don't have a husband (surprise) and I thought, there are probably more than 52 reasons why I love my best friendship. 

I spent about an hour making the cards and coming up with all my reasons. When I was finished, I read them all back to myself and I even started to get a bit teary-eyed. Knowing that I could easily write 52 reasons why my friendship with Bezzy is the best one I've ever had made me smile. I guess the ironic part of the entire gift is the fact that I set out to make her day a little bit brighter and in turn ended up doing the same for myself.

Another great thing I learned was that you never really know how much you care about someone until their misfortunes and sadness weigh you down too. We were talking the other day about how sad she was that I was having a sad day at work and she wished it wasn't so. I also mentioned to her that I hoped her upcoming week wasn't sad because it would make me sad. You really never want to see the people closest to you be anything but happy.

All those times that you didn't leave, it's been occurring to me, I'd like to hang out with you for my whole life. - Taylor Swift